I don’t know many people who developed the habit of reading in their adulthood. I haven’t yet heard a story about someone who hated reading as a child and then had adulthood open their eyes to the wonder that are books. I’m sure they are there but in my experience book-lovers are often people who couldn’t put a book down as children.

And then they went to high school.
I cannot count how many people I have met who see me reading and proceed to lament about how they used to read a lot when they were younger. It is often followed by a note to themselves that they should start reading again. And a justification of their non-reading ways (I just don’t have the time, I’m so busy these days!)

Sometimes they attempt to borrow one of my books; an attempt that normally falls flat on its face because people grossly underestimate how expensive books are. We all know that when you lend a book it rarely ever comes back. I don’t want to hate you because you lost my book and you don’t want to bear the wrath of someone whose book you have lost or ruined. Just make it easy on all of us: buy your own books.

But I don’t blame them when they are overcome with nostalgia for their story-filled pasts. I know what that’s like–most habitual readers do. We’ve all gone through that stage when we just stopped reading. For those who have their lives together that period lasts maybe a year. For the rest of us, it’s a bit longer than that. Many people never pick up the habit again. But we remember periods in our lives when we didn’t read as much as we previously did, when we no longer stayed up till ungodly hours to finish a book, when we had long lists of all the books we were actively seeking out. And I have found that for many people, myself included, that period began around the time high school did.

We all agree our education system is…erm… problematic. We spent primary school being told to read more than we watched television, being taught and told to write summaries of the ‘appropriate’ storybooks we had to buy (Remember those books by Sasa Sema Publications?), and being told that the only way to write better compositions was to read storybooks.

And then in high school…what are novels? There was no time to read for leisure. How could there be when you had more ‘important’ things to read? Things that you would be tested on and which would ultimately determine your future after four years of cramming them. I had teachers who would confiscate any novels they found in a student’s possession. They would look at the cover, sneer, and ask, ‘So this is the rubbish you are filling your head with? This is what is making you fail chemistry?’And that was that. You didn’t even have a chance to protest that you were failing chemistry because clearly chemistry was never designed to be passed.

You couldn’t read late into the night because lights were to be out by 11 pm. You couldn’t read during the day because of classes and assignments from morning to night. You couldn’t read during breaks because if you didn’t scramble for food then you didn’t eat, and if you didn’t eat fast enough then you’d be late and get punished. There was too much stuff that was ‘more important’ than stories and with time you just stopped trying. We were always told to focus all our energies on reading for exams, for KCSE, and that all those others things, those your hobbies like reading, you could do them after you were out of those gates. Anybody remember the ‘you came through those gates alone and you will walk out of them alone’ line?

It’s obvious that most of us who went to public high schools hated it and would never go back. It’s also obvious that the ones who are currently in high school also hate it and can’t wait to get out. And there are so many reasons why, so many things wrong with the system. In my opinion, we hate it because of all that it took away from us.

Many of us had the passion literally beaten out of us. We were slaves to a system that told us we could only be this or that and we could only do this or that. All the while feeding us lies like ‘dream big’ and ‘you can do anything you set your mind to’ so that we didn’t die completely. Is it any wonder so many of us never pick up again the habits and passions we left in high school?

So when you regret that you don’t read anymore, I get you. I don’t blame you. Books are a place for dreams and sometimes life happens and dreams no longer make sense in the real world.

The education system failed me by taking away my love for books, my ability to finish a book in two days, my knowledge of what the world beyond me has to offer. At least for that period of my life. But always, there is hope. I am privileged to live in a time and place where people’s love for books and for stories is returning. And so are you.

You can do yourself a favor by attending this year’s Storymoja Festival. You can be surrounded by books and book lovers for a few days and finally get the inspiration to start reading again. You can find the passion that you lost somewhere along the way. You can even buy your own books! Or you know, replace the ones you borrowed and lost or ruined.

What matters is that you take back what your (somewhat faulty) education took away from you. It’s time to dream and live with passion again!